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Reflection of Thoughts


When I left for hostel ,I had a curiosity to test myself , I wanted to observe myself , I challenged myself to adjust in a completely different atmosphere . I still remember on my first hostel day I left my home with an anxiety knot in my stomach but I kept mellowing myself down because I did not wanted to make my mother nervous as well. I waved off my parents with a big smile masking the hollowness and loneliness that I experienced at that moment. I convinced myself that I was fine. But as the night approached my emotions overpowered my lonesome soul and came out as tears from my eyes. I cried like a baby. It felt as if someone has taken a part of me and my heart sank down. I cried a river to let go my grief of separation from my loved ones, my parents, my family .Today  it feels completely different , I  now realise how important is it to let go of the people we are most attached to, it breaks our heart open, helps us realise our potential to the hilt. It makes you more emotionally stronger and stable. Sooner this kind of detachment hits us, the better it is. Because later it becomes a little more difficult, a little more painful, because the grief of separation is inevitable, it has to occur someday or the other. I am acquainted with my hostel life and now hostel feels like home. It feels like I belong there ,this a sign of detachment from home, this makes me realise that I have finally learned to let go the feeling to cling onto someone or something’s in life to feel emotionally sane. I feel more independent all of a sudden  ...” I am now realising that nothing is permanent in this Life, everything is transitory only the soul is eternal…”The people I grew up with, the place I grew in doesn’t feel the same anymore only because I am no more habituated to this place.No doubt that attachment and love for my home and family members still exists but I am now more emotionally stable and I have an  “Attachment with Detachment “When I come to my home for holidays I begin to fall in love with it all over again. While leaving back to the hostel , traces of the aversion of those not so good feelings of the 1st day visit me , I feel a little depressed but that’s temporary and this feeling fades away in a jiffy.
I behold at the lines the great Shakespeare wrote “ Life is a stage , You come alone and go alone “So true!!!! . Now I feel the depth and real meanings of his words.Such a bitter truth of life.  

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